The Road of Life

Hello World!

Wow I think we are finally done with the Tanksgiving leftovers. Phew, I was getting sick of Turkey. So my Thanksgiving was good. Had the extended family over. Always entertaining. There is never a dull moment when the whole family, both sides, get together. I was glad to see them but more happy when they left! HA. I'll see them ALL again in a month for Christmas. Can't wait, haha.

Speaking of family... Sometimes I wish dogs could talk. My puppy dog has been acting funny for 2 days. Funny like out of the norm. He isn't sick or atleast visiably sick. He is just real needy and doesn't want to leave my side. Don't get me wrong I lovvvee that he wants to be with me all the time, but its not normal for him. So I wish he could just tell me what was up. It would be so much easier. Hm, hope he's out of this funk soon.

Well still no Transplant call. I think it is more frustrating waiting then it will be to actually go through it. For the first month I was on the list I had sever anxiety. Anxiety about waiting, about getting the call, about missing the call, about not making it through the surgery, just tons of stuff. I have sinced relaxed. Now I'm more antsy then anxious. I know life is going to be better post transplant, I'm ready for it now!

Waiting has put my life on hold it seems like. I finshed college so I'm done with school. I'm deemed medically disabled so I can't get a job. Occupying myself with things to do is so hard. Without having a job saving money is not easy, I still have bills. So I don't have "extra" money to spend on going out. I depend on other people to take me out. I hate that. I feel like such a useless person sometimes. Sometimes I feel like everyone around me is going 65 on the highway of life and I'm in the breakdown lane with a flat tire. It sucks.

Well, something I do do to keep me a little busy is go to Pulmonary Rehab. Every Tuesday and Thursday. So as tomorrow is a Tuesday, I need some sleep.

Breathe Easy